Planning a Trip to the Shetlands

So, I’m planning a bit of a trip. It’s slightly cathartic in a way, and definitely exciting/scary in equal measures. I’m looking to head up to Stromness by bike. There are a few reasons for this, many of them — as with most things in life — sentimentally rooted. I visited the Orkneys a couple of years back for a SCUBA diving trip; in between dives, we took time to travel around the isles, which proved to be very evoking and touching. There is somewhat of a dissonant note being played whenever you are in that type of territory — a hint of solitude, mixed with freedom, sadness, joy and oppression. Odd combination, but it somehow manages to hold a harmony through those notes. Why Shetlands then? Following our trip to the Orkneys, I’ve been wanting to visit the Shetlands for a different diving trip. However, following COVID and how the entire thing was handled by the diving body and its divers, I can’t shake the feeling of being a bit betrayed by the ‘community’; a community that was quick at shutting down, calling out anyone asking for flexibility, and was double quick at opening up the shutters again and demanding our money when possible. Meanwhile, scores of other sports were allowed to carry on; even those that could not, did try to put up a fight (even if only for show). For a crowd that flaunted being tough, smart and individualistic rebels, divers had been the biggest sheep of them all. You can argue they did nothing wrong, and that’s fine. But I am in no rush to give my money to that industry for now.

I will not be going to Shetlands for diving any time soon then. But that may be no bad thing; when I went to the Orkneys, I seriously regretted not being able to explore more of the place. The diving had been decent, but my main memories of the place surrounded the road trip up to Scotland with my best friend (and best man), the euphoric overnight stop in Carlisle with the smoked salmon and olives dinner, the hunt for the elusive McD’s for brekkie (we could see it, but could not get the car to it), the harrowing sight of my friend hoovering up a box of celebrations, and the ferry trip over. Once on the isles, the best memories are of the visit to the neolithic sites, the museum, shops, beach village and general exploring. We had our mandatory visit in Twatt, we daydreamed about living there and we took in some pretty awesome sights.

The Shetlands are likely to provide a similar and different experience altogether. And this time, I want to explore it a bit more thoroughly — without going overboard. Below are the main things I am going to share my thoughts on for now, while I make sense of those ideas.

Company

Route

Itinerary

Mindset

Half the reason I enjoyed Scapa is the company. I have a very good group of friends; they have the same quirky sense of humour as me, they are all a bit touched in the head, they all have a touch of cynicism and, most importantly, put up with me for some weird reason. We all met years ago due to diving, but stuck around for everything else.

Another dive trip

I *could* try to arrange another dive trip with a similar crowd, but due to mental scarring from the first trip, costs, places being booked up for years to come, logistics and the hypocrisy of the plan given the opening paragraphs, I will discard this option.

A group road trip

I could try to just arrange a road trip up to the Shetlands. At first glance this sounds amazing, right? Recreate the atmosphere, bring your friends with you, and hope it all goes well. After all, Friends + Trip = Good Times, right? A loose plan with your friends, and let the memories form? Nah. Our group coalesced around a diving objective for Scapa; we are all objective driven, so we would need something to focus on. We would need a target. Something to achieve. To make it work, we’d need something atypical in order to drive an atypical journey. I hadn’t thought of this until I started typing this paragraph, so this blog is proving useful already. We *could* arrange a shore dive at Skaw Beach. All on lightweight kit just to say we’ve done it. Fuck, that might be crazy enough that it might work. I would have to come up with a good enough plan to make the most of the isles, but I have better navigators and explorers within the group, so as long as I am successful at lighting the spark, they would plan the rest. nice week off, gentle tootle up on a Monday morning, get to Aberdeen for 19:00, get into Lerwick at 07:00 via ferry, explore Shetlands for two-three days, hop into Orkneys on Friday morning, head out in the evening via ferry overnight to Aberdeen and lazily head back home. That could work. Friends in a car, me on the bike, get best of both worlds? Maybe.

Group bike trip

This is my second least favourite option. You’re always riding at someone else’s pace, compromising on plans, speed, stops and itinerary. It kind of works in a car because you can be a bit more relaxed, and you are going to be a bit more comfortable, so there is more room for compromise… but not so much on the bike. I’ll be cold, wind-swept, tired, stiff, hungry, bursting for a pee or a combination of these. I’d rather have those moments on my own, so that they do not linger for too long. Also it means I can skip/dwell on any stop I like. The more I am biking, the less I like the idea of group riding for long distances. I might be convinced otherwise though.

Solo bike trip

This would be my spiritual favourite. A week completely on my own with my thoughts. I’ve been wanting to have a solo week for a very long time, and this would be it. But this is also why it’s scary, somewhat unconsciously. I’ve not been alone like that for years. Would I regret not having others to share it with? Possibly. Would I enjoy it? Absolutely. Could I go a second time with friends? Sure… and now that I think about it, this combined option might be the way forward, as I get to enjoy the solitude and take the edge off for when I go with others. A week on my own… nice. I might even keep the smartphone switched off.

Route

The key aspect of the trip is getting to the Shetlands. I hate driving through mainland Scotland. I don’t care how beautiful and majestic the view is, it’s fucking boring and I genuinely think that hours of average speed cameras is downright fastidious, dangerous and dim. So fuck you Scotland, I am taking my money somewhere that is not that stretch of road. Bitching aside, the most efficient way to get to the Shetlands anyway is via ferry from Aberdeen. Last time I went to the Orkneys was via ferry from Scrabster, and we all regretted that. The ferry from Aberdeen is way dearer, but if I set off from home at an early hour and get to the ferry by 19:00, I can combine that with my hotel stay for Night 1. So I guess this leads me into a breakdown of the route:

• (Day 1) Midlands to Aberdeen
• (Night 1) Ferry to Lerwick
• (Day 2) Lerwick to Skaw Beach, Gloup, North Roe
• (Night 2) North Roe
• (Day 3) Sumburgh Head, Lerwick, Ferry to Kirkwall (17:00)
• (Night 3) Arrive in Kirkwall, sleep
• (Day 4) Orkneys day
• (Night 4) Ferry to Aberdeen
• (Day 5) Go home

The challenge comes in with the timings of the ferries. I can’t hop between Shetlands and Orkneys freely, as the ferries only stop over on certain days. *IF* I want to preserve the plan above, I would have to get to Aberdeen on a Friday for 19:00, which will get me into Shetlands by 07:00. I do not want to mess the order of the Isles, as the main objective is getting to the Shetlands and leave the Orkneys as a sacrificial stop, depending how the plan is going.

So, let’s see if the plan works out when I plug week days in.

• (Wed) — Midlands to Aberdeen
• (Wed Night) — Ferry to Lerwick
• (Thursday) Lerwick to Skaw Beach, Gloup, North Roe
• (Thursday Night) — North Roe
• (Friday) Melby, Sumburgh Head, Lerwick
• (Friday Night) — Ferry to Kirkwall
• (Saturday) — Orkneys
• (Saturday Night) — Orkneys
• (Sunday) — Ferry to Scrabster (06:30), get to Alnwick for 17:00
• (Sunday Night) Alnwick?
• (Monday) Head home

There is no practical way to head back to Aberdeen via Kirkwall unless I want to spend 48 hours in the Orkneys. However, if I do, I might be able to spend a second night in the Orkneys as opposed to a night in Alnwick. Hmm, so maybe, that might be worth it. I might use the second day to ferry over to some of the smaller isles! OK, next version:

• (Mon) — Midlands to Aberdeen
• (Mon Night) — Ferry to Lerwick
• (Tues) Lerwick to Skaw Beach, Gloup, North Roe
• (Tues Night) — North Roe
• (Weds) Melby, Sumburgh Head, Lerwick
• (Weds Night) — Ferry to Kirkwall
• (Thurs) — Orkneys
• (Thurs Night) — Orkneys
• (Fri) — Orkneys
• (Fri Night) — Ferry to Aberdeen
• (Sat) — Aberdeen to Midlands

Yeah, I am liking that more. The idea of spending a random night in a random town on the way home was unappealing and an anti-climatic way to tail the trip off.

Itinerary

Oh this will be fleshed out rather dynamically. The Shetlands have not gone many “landmarks” to speak, so I mainly plan to visit the Skaw Beach and the Sumburgh Lighthouse while the rest is all locations. The Orkneys will be visited more on the hoof, based on weather and energy levels. With two days in the Orkneys, I can afford to take a ferry to the smaller isles, which I had not done before. The ferry sailings will be the limiting factors, but at first glance a morning spent in Westray may be interesting.

I’ll programme the satnav with the waypoints and the route. I will have a separate list on the phone a general list of places of interest. I am not going to pretend that I will take a paper map.

Mindset

Self-reliance, adventure, exploration, discovery? What cliché words do I need to pull out for this? I will be on my own, with a plan and a route. I will have a camera, a camelbak and some snacks. I will take my time to get to places, stop frequently, chill whenever I feel like and stop when I want to stop. I will be snacking all day with a nice dinner early-ish in the evening. The plan will be for guidance, but I can’t mess about with the ferry times. I will probably find some quiet spots to stop and chill for a bit, rather than rushing around to see everything. This is about me-time, and doing things I like, after all. I am not much of a tourist, so I won’t be racing to see everything that can be seen. I will take the camera and photograph what I feel like photographing, without pressure to take any specific shots. If I feel weird enough, I might even just go with a film camera to really force myself to think before each shot. Now, that might be an idea. Apart from that, I need to combat tiredness; I *will* get tired and start getting distracted. I need to stop often and keep myself amused. I need to snack and I need to keep the blood flowing.

Kit

It’ll be May-June, so it won’t be too cold. It will probably be very wet. Maybe sunny. It’s definitely Goretex touring jacket territory along with touring waterproof trousers. High boots and gauntlet gloves should sort me out for most scenarios. And if for some weird reason it’s warm, the jacket has enough ventilation options, and I’ll have a spare visor plus the internal sunglasses.

Packing

Yeah, fun. This might be the excuse for a touring bike, who knows. If I go on my R, it could get interesting. Small tank bag with basic stuff like visor, spare gloves, neck covering, different gloves, etc, into which I decant overnight items for the ferry trip. As I won’t be doing many touristy things, I do not need many changes of clothing, but plenty of underwear, which are easy to pack. If I take three sets of underlayers for the six days, six sets of underwear and three t-shirts, I should be fine. Add to that a pair of simple shoes, a pair of jeans and a hoodie, and we’re done. A USB charger, bluetooth headset and shower gel should finish the pack off. I will need to find a way to squeeze a DSLR/SLR in the bags and I need to fight the temptation to take multiple lenses with me. This feels like a 35mm lens trip. I’ll then have the usual tail pack with the motorbike essentials — tyre kit, inflator, tool kit, wheel lock. I will need to cram a chain and lock somewhere for the hotel stays, plus some straps for the ferry. Fuck, the list is growing… Who’s going to nick my bike in the Shetlands and Orkneys!? I might just take motion-sensitive wheel locks and rely on those plus the immobiliser, steering lock, tracker and general remoteness of where I’m staying. Given that I’ll be on the bike for so long, I will forego the hydration bladder on my back. No matter how good the harness is, I would imagine it will take its toll over the course of a week; the bladder can go in the tank bag. I might take the video camera, but set it to timelapse on the engine guards.

Here we go then. The plan makes sense to me; as much as it can make sense when reading a plan on paper. Next up, I need to figure out the packing strategy, because 1) I hate bags 2) I hate backpacks. I also need a test run on the bike as soon as lockdown is lifted and see how I feel after a 300mi day.